During the last year and a half, I’ve learned things about human behaviour and interaction that I could not have even imagined. Here’s something profound which can help you brand yourself as an exceptional person and/or business. You will see that you must be ethical in your life, or life will bite you in painful places!
Do not use these to beat yourself up. Use them to evaluate your behaviour and the behaviour of others. It is possible, even likely, that you will see and understand some things/people things quite differently in future!
Between humans, there are 4 types of exchange:
4. Exchange in Abundance
1. Criminal exchange includes stealing from another or not paying them for something. However it includes some things which may surprise you. If you say you will start a webinar at 7 pm and you begin at 7:10 pm, that’s criminal exchange. There may be valid reasons for that. It still doesn’t change the nature of the exchange. Some people were robbed of their time! If you give your child a present, and they don’t thank you (genuinely), that’s criminal exchange and you have been robbed. If you give your children an allowance and do not require them to do something for it – you have turned them into criminals! You have given them something and they have not reciprocated – they got something for nothing!
2. Partial exchange is now easy to explain. You promised your 5 year-old daughter a chocolate birthday cake covered in sprinkles (her favorite item!). You gave her chocolate cake without the sprinkles. Another example – a business has a sale on some expensive t-shirts, and advertises that they come in 7 different colours. When you get there, there are only 6 colours available. This doesn’t include the case where they ran out of the 7th colour because so many people showed up to buy. If they never had the 7th colour available, it is partial exchange.
3. Fair Exchange is probably now obvious – you got what you were told you would get – you got exactly what you paid for!
4. Exchange in abundance is what sets people and businesses apart from the ordinary. It helps you brand yourself if you do it consistently. Suppose you are a massage therapist. One day you tell a client that although they paid for one hour, you are going to give them one and a half hours. That is not exchange in abundance! If, on the other hand, as they are leaving, you give them a book or a DVD with which they can learn to manage their pain themselves – then you have given them exchange in abundance.
Exchange in abundance is never more of the same. It’s the addition of something unexpected, something different. The monetary value of the added item is generally unimportant. This exchange can be called over-deliver – but you must also never under promise. Promise exactly what you are intending to deliver, a fair exchange, and then by addition, somehow turn it into exchange in abundance!
OK – quiz time:
Which can get you wide publicity? Items 1 & 4. Which publicity do you want?
Make it a habit and practice to always give exchange in abundance in business and in your personal life. You will be recognized, your business will be branded – and, it will all be positive.
How can you turn your children into criminals? Spoil them. How does this work??? The difference is in how the conscious and unconscious minds work. The unconscious mind always knows what type of exchange is going on. The conscious mind may or may not – it depends on experience, knowledge and perhaps quickness of perception at the time.
When you give a young child an allowance, and they do not have any responsibility to exchange something for this, the unconscious mind realizes: “I got something for nothing. I’m a criminal.” Usually, when they are small, they don’t know how to deal with this. When they are teenagers, they are physically big enough to rebel against being made into criminals. And so they do!
Ever wonder why a spoiled child behaves ever more badly in many cases? If you are small, and you have been turned into a criminal by a parent, how do you tell them or show them that you don’t like it? Bad behaviour is one obvious way that young child can show their disapproval. Then their behaviour gets worse after you “punish” them in some way.
Why? Because they legitimately know that they are right. And, you are punishing them for pointing out what you have done. Bad behaviour is perhaps the only way that they can show you that something is wrong – you! They are usually too young to even begin verbalizing this, and you are now telling them again that they are wrong!
Once you internalize these ideas, you will see many situations in a completely different light. Hope these ideas are useful to you.